My mom died a month ago. I have everything and nothing to share about this. I am not even sure what kind of post I want or need this to be. About her? About me? I am left living with only one of those things, so here we go. As most of you know, I’ve […]
It’s Been a Long Fucking While.
January 12, 2025 | Alzheimer's, caregiving, dementia, life, mental health, selfcare, Uncategorized | Permalink
Mishaps
December 21, 2020 | Alzheimer's, caregiving, dementia, life | Permalink
Yesterday, my dad used a Le Creuset baking dish to try to fry an egg on the stove top. When he cracked the egg into the dish, it shattered into 30 pieces. Today, my mom put toothpaste on a bar of soap in order to brush her teeth. THIS later insanity, I caught in the […]
Things my mom can’t remember – update
December 9, 2020 | Alzheimer's, caregiving, dementia | Permalink
Things my mom can’t remember : What happened 2 minutes ago. That there is a global pandemic. That she was in the hospital and could have died. That she does not know how to hygienically wipe her own ass. Sigh. My role as a caregiver has most certainly changed since we last spoke.
WTF
December 9, 2020 | Alzheimer's, caregiving, life | Permalink
What the hell happened? How did I just drop off the map in March and, quite literally, forget that this blog was sitting here? I’ll tell you. COVID happened and they sent my kid home from school and she has not been back since. A spring, a summer, a fall and it’s now December. So […]
Sad face. Covid-19 style.
March 14, 2020 | caregiving, health, life, mental health, parenting | Permalink
In the days leading up to the covid-19 social isolation, I felt a distinct thrill like you might on the eve of a snow day or the moment the lights go out and you have to find the candles, but as I face this first full day, I just have to say that I am […]
The Hardest Part
March 13, 2020 | caregiving, life, mental health, patriarchy | Permalink
When I decided to move home to be the full-time caregiver for my family, I expected the hardest part would be to manage my mom’s ever-increasing dementia. Of course, this would be hard. The world tells you how hard this will be and I had few illusions. I also wondered if being a for-real stay […]
This shitty week
March 13, 2020 | caregiving, health, life | Permalink
This week, I took my dad to the ER for what looked like a heart attack (it was not). My aunt was moved to hospice and my cousins have no idea if she will be 5 days or 5 months. I scheduled an appointment with a lawyer for the first time ever to make sure […]
The Things We Know
March 2, 2020 | Alzheimer's, caregiving, dementia, life | Permalink
My mom started showing signs of dementia right around the time my kid was born. Maybe even before. That was six years ago. I took her to see her first neurologist 5 years ago. We were sent home with the advice that my mom should exercise more. “There was nothing to be done,” they told […]
Where to start? Again.
February 23, 2020 | caregiving, life | Permalink
The daughter I tried so hard for back in 2011 and 2012 is now 6 and a half. She is fucking brilliant. Hard, but brilliant. Her name is Pema Aldrin Lenz. Best. Name. Ever. After only two years of my daughter’s life, her dad and I split. We continued to live together for our finances […]
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